I believe that everyone one of us has a longing to be loved, and a desire to be the apple of someone's eye…
we want so badly to be accepted and cared for, and to know that we bring pleasure to the heart of someone we love.
And yet, sadly enough, our love is sometimes rejected and cast aside,leaving us broken and wondering where we went wrong.
That rejection can often be crippling and if we're not careful, it can rob us of our identity and of all that we are.
I'm sad to admit that I've been on the receiving end of this type of rejection, and time and time again I've wondered if I will ever get over the heartache and the pain.
Maybe it's worse when, as a mama, it's one of your children who have rejected your love and walked away….
And when those years of love and care have just been cast aside and treated as though they never existed at all, it's then that your heart is shattered and you know you'll never be the same.
I've spent many many hours these past two years, aching for the love I've given to be reciprocated; only to be told that my love is not wanted, nor is my care.
I've wrestled with that and I've come close to feeling worthless and as though I've failed as a mom.
You see, I've come to realize that my identity was wrapped up in who I was as this child's mom, rather than who I am in Christ.
And I allowed that false identity to rule my heart and my emotions, and I've allowed this rejection to strip me of the identity I have as a child of the One true God.
I can see now how easy it has been for me, as a mom, to long so much for this child's love and approval, that it has become an idol of sorts, something I've craved and allowed to crowd out my vision of God.
I've so wanted her approval and her care that I've lost sight of how unconditional and limitless God's love and approval for me really is.
You see, I've come to realize that my Hope and my identity rests in Who Jesus is and in who I am in Him…
And I've learned that there's no hurt when I trust in His love, because His love never fails.
It's been a long, hard road I've travelled these past twenty-two months, yet God,in his kindness, keeps showing me priceless truths and continues to carry me all the way.